27 August 2006

I'm off to Bonnie Scotland!

Hey everybody :)

Yes, I'm off to Loch Lomond very early tomorrow morning, so I thought I would type a quick post now, as I won't have time in the morning. I'm in need of a break again - also yesterday (August 26th) was my wedding anniversary, so I decided to take the week off, as I would have been on holiday(in normal circumstances) anyway.

Yesterday was suprisingly OK. Mind you, I had booked a full body aromatherapy massage for the morning, so I pretty much floated along yesterday after that! But I didn't cry, or mope, so yet another hurdle successfully over with. My Ma, Sisters, Brother's in Law and all my friends were really proud of me....and I was proud of me too. I'd been dreading the 26th for so long, but when it finally reared it's scary head, I showed it a karate chop or two and sent it flying :)))

I will be back sometime on Friday September 1st, so at least I'll have Saturday and Sunday to recover, as it's going to be a long journey (roughly about 5ish hours I estimate there and back). I shall be bringing my trusty digital camera with me, so when I come back I'll post some photies. I plan to have a few trip days. I'm hoping to catch the ferry to Oban, a beautiful place, and then visit Stirling Castle - I'm sure I'll be bring back some awesome pics!

I also just wanted to take this opportunity to thank you all for your kind words, your support, your friendship and your love and understanding. I think, in fact I KNOW, that if I didn't have such wonderful friends out there in the stitching/blogging world, I don't think I mentally would have made it. Your advice and your friendship has kept me strong, and it continues to do so, and a special thanks goes out to a certain few (they know who they are). Every single one of you are my Guardian Angels...bless you and lots of ((((((((((HUGS)))))))))) to all of you.

Take care, have a lovely week and I'll post when I get back.
Lots of Love xxxxxxx

17 August 2006

World of the Strange

Hi all

It's been a while, but I'm back. Thanks for your patience. A lot of things have happened since I last posted.

DH has finally moved out, which was, to say the least, very traumatic. But it's done now and for the moment I can begin to heal. Although I never wanted him to move out, I wanted him to (sounds contradictory I know) because it was getting to the point where I would physically hurt every time I clapped eyes on him. I was stuck in limbo - I could neither move on or get some sort of closure. Him still being here also sent out huge mixed messages - "Sorry dear, I don't love you anymore, but despite making a few attempts to find a place of my own, I'm going to stay here and act like nothing's happened." It was very draining and it also started affecting my health and sanity, so something had to give. A fortnight ago on Wednesday, he moved in temporarily with his best friend.

It's been tough trying to adjust. It's almost like learning to walk again - it's a new routine, a new way of doing things. To say it was strange is an understatement, but, I'm slowly beginnning to come to terms with it. It doesn't stop me missing him like crazy - I still love him - and it's weird to find him not there in the morning, but right now there's nothing I can do about it, other than just get on with life and enjoy it the best I can. Fudge is being really clingy at the moment - I think he can sense that I'm still sad and upset, but also I know that he misses DH too. Fudge has started sleeping at the foot of the bed - this morning he was doing his impression of a furry six-pointed star, on his back purring and snorring at the same time!

I've started going to counselling and that has been a huge help. It's liberating to be able to sound off at someone who's totally neutral, who doesn't know your family and the baggage they carry around. My counsellor (Lizzie) is really great. Still, I'm worried about Husband, as I don't think he's properly talked to anybody about how he's doing or feeling. It's hard to guage, as nearly all my friends are mutual friends of his as well, so I don't know whether they're not telling me if he's talked to them because they think it might hurt my feelings or whether he's just not said anything. Hopefully I'll find out soon. If he doesn't face up to what's happened and try to mask how he's feeling by staying out every night or going to friends houses every night, not having total space and time on his own to reflect, it'll catch up with him sooner all later - and he'll crash and burn.

Meanwhile, to change the subject, I've started a new project, which I'm loving at the moment because it's so easy to stitch - I will take some photos over the weekend and post them so you can see. I'll leave you with piccies of Misty and Fudge.....

Here's Fudge hogging the bed.....

...and one of him ignorning me completely!.........

...and Misty being totally cute...awwww

Thanks for listening and thanks to you, my wonderful stitching friends, for making my blog worthwhile and for being brilliant. Take care xxxxxxx

01 August 2006

I Knew I was 'Feline' a bit Weird

You Are: 40% Dog, 60% Cat

You and cats have a lot in common.
You're both smart and in charge - with a good amount of attitude.
However, you do have a very playful side that occasionally comes out!

Yes, I know, it's a terrible pun but it had to be done - I'm also a poet but didn't know it. Oh dear Carto, step away from the cringe-worthy gags before its tractor beam sucks you in!

I couldn't resist this, yet another personality quiz and thank goodness, I am more cat than dog. Not that I don't like dogs - if I could have one I would, but Fudge wouldn't be a happy catty. But it confirms the suspicion I've had for a long time...and I was wondering why I couldn't stop playing with Fudge's toys!